An offering for 2023 Vyāsa-pūjā

All glories to Śrī Śrī Guru and Gaurāṅga! My Śrīla Gurudeva's Vyāsa-pūjā mahotsava ki jaya!

Dear devotees and friends, please accept my praṇāma.

A couple weeks ago, I sent out an invitation here for anyone to write a homage in honor of my Śrīla Gurudeva, which I'd post here on his Vyāsa-pūjā today. I was starting to think that I wasn't going to receive anything, when suddenly, this morning, I was very happy to find in my inbox a heartfelt śraddhāñjali by Rūpamañjarī Dīdī. It's been a (blissfully) busy day, so I'm only now getting a chance to post it. :)

I offer my koṭi daṇḍavat praṇāma to my Harināma Guru, my Śrīla Guru Mahārāja, Śrīla Bhakti Pramode Purī Mahārāja, and to my Dīkṣā Guru and Śrīla Gurudeva Śrīla Bhakti Ballabh Tīrtha Mahārāja. By their mercy I am connected to the gloriously merciful Sārasvata Gauḍīya sampradāya, and only by their instructions and blessings have I ever managed to seek out harikathā, Vaiṣṇava saṅga, and opportunities for Vaiṣṇava sevā.  

In the time, place, and circumstances of my adult life, such a major portion of the like-minded sources of these three most necessary spiritual streams has come by the mercy of Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja, and he has supplied such significant instruction for nourishing my inchoate śraddhā in my Śrīla Guru Mahārāja and Śrīla Gurudeva, that I am forever indebted to him as my Śikṣā Guru. The relief work of saving a tiny sprout of bhakti that is withering, reminding the hapless gardener of the seed-giver’s provided instructions and supplies and provisions, and giving emergency irrigation, indicates not just kindness to the hapless gardener, but profound loving fellowship with the seed-giver. Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja was being profoundly merciful to the disciples of others in the West who were struggling in separation from our Guru-varga, or without saṅgas, and he was also acting on his sambandha with those Guru-varga. The best guardian aunt or uncle starts out as a loving sibling. This type of deep shared regard among the stalwart teachers of pure bhakti is not just beautiful to behold – which is an inkling of what it is like to behold the saṅkīrtana parties that surround our Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu – but that deep shared regard is also the well-spring of all my good fortune. I am so grateful that Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja both exemplified it and endowed so many of his disciples with an urge to follow in his footsteps.  

“Don’t be hopeless!” he exhorted devotees all over the world. “Keep trying.” And he reminded us of so many different ways we can try, so many tools and supports we have been given, to sustain our precious sprout of devotion, that every book our Guru-varga has given us is part of their personality, present to guide us; that every song they have written for us to sing is their interceding prayer alongside us; that the storied dust of every place of divine pastime is medicine to keep us going; that spending time doing kīrtana, in chanting and listening to harikathā, is both the ecstatic means and the glorious end.  

In the purport to Bhagavad-gītā 6.35, Śrīla Swāmī Mahārāja Śrīla Prabhupāda writes, “In the present age no one can observe the strict rules and regulations of placing oneself in a sacred place, focusing the mind on the Supersoul, restraining the senses and mind, observing celibacy, remaining alone, etc. By the practice of Kṛṣṇa consciousness, however, one engages in nine types of devotional service to the Lord. The first and foremost of such devotional engagements is hearing about Kṛṣṇa. This is a very powerful transcendental method for purging the mind of all misgivings. The more one hears about Kṛṣṇa, the more one becomes enlightened and detached from everything that draws the mind away from Kṛṣṇa.”

Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja reminded us to engage in such hearing deliberately, prayerfully, attentively, and with an aspiration for the proper mood. He always reminded us to keep in mind where we want to go as we set out to go there—that our goal is rāgānuga-bhakti and rādhā-dāsyam. Keeping this destination firmly on our head, he carefully delineated many of the tools we could use on our way. Very affectionately and with very helpful pedagogy, he kept his disciples secure in his pocket, and tutored his friends’ disciples in our masters’ teachings,  always, always exhorting us – “Do not be hopeless.”

Like some kind of swamp creature rising out of the mud, I have been moving towards those tools in ultra slow motion. It seems that I have barely moved in the last few years. But I know the glowing set of tools is on the bank waiting, the shining destination sign is overhead, I have his disciples as like-minded association, cheering me on, and that I must not become hopeless. So I don’t give up and I offer him my daṇḍavat praṇāma on his holy Vyāsa-pūjā mahā-mahotsava and ask for his blessings and forgiveness of my many offenses.

—Rūpamañjarī Devī dāsī